This article was probably written by an Insult Comic.
A TeeVeePedian has nominated this article as one that contains insult comedy.
Discussion of this nomination may or may not be found in the comments or Forums.

You wanna talk about Andy Griffith? Man, that guy is old.

How old is Andy Griffith? He is so old his memory is in black-and-white!

That Andy Griffith is so old, his first car was a chariot.

Did I say that he was old? So old, in fact, his copy of The Bible is autographed!

Andy Griffith is so old, his birth certificate expired.

Hey, I love this guy. He also starred in The Andy Griffith Show and Salvage One. Let's give Andy Griffith a big hand, ladies and gentlemen! At his age, he needs it!

That's my time. Enjoy Bachman Turner Overdrive.